I’m back!

I’ve finally got far enough through processing my last week  that once again I can think in vaguely grammatically correct and possibly even coherent sentences.  So here goes…

In the words of that famous Chinese curse/blessing, I’ve been living in interesting times on a  very personal level.  ‘Stuff’ of a serious nature has been happening to/with/for me on both the physical and metaphysical levels.  I’ll deal with the physical first, so those of you who aren’t into the metaphysical can escape gracefully!  Although if you’re squeamish you may want to leave right now…

Right.

For those of you still here, I shall continue.

The Physical.

A few years ago I was diagnosed with endometriosis. About 18 months later I had my innards scraped out (the posh term is ‘laprascopy’), a relatively straightforward procedure greatly complicated by me getting fluid in my lungs from the anaesthetic process.  Apparently I was full of endo and they weren’t able to scrape it all out (when the consultant gynacologist told me it was a ‘hard operation’, I chose to believe him!)  I won a couple of months of pain relief and then it was back to normal.

For the last 18 months or so, I’ve been back and forth to the specialist – it takes a while because I’m using our public health system and the appointments are approximately six-monthly.  My six-monthly follow up for my December ’08 appointment was last week (do the maths!).

After a discussion with a wonderful registrar (not at all sarcastic here), it seems likely that, as well as the endo, I also have adenomyosis, a diagnosis they cannot formally confirm without removing my womb.

So my options for further treatment in the Western medical sytem appear to consist of having a hysterectomy (which may or may not fix the endo) or leaving it alone and taking large quantities of painkillers for a week each month while lying in bed whimpering until I hit menopause.  Strangely, I find neither of these options terribly attractive.

So, I thought I would see what Oriental medicine has to offer me.

On Friday, I went for my first ever acupuncture appointment.  To paraphrase the diagnosis, I’m a stagnating pond!  That is, excessively damp and rather blocked up.  I really appreciated having my whole body/person considered, rather than just bits.  I’m also extremely happy, because I haven’t taken antihistamine since the appointment and I’m not having any of my usual hayfever/sinus issues (although Friday evening was VERY soggy – I’m guessing that was the excessive dampness leaving!)  I have my fingers crossed for a similar result for the rest of my body.  I have my next appointment on Thursday.  I’ll let you know how it goes.

We’ll now move onto the metaphysical.  Those readers not into this may like to visit this website instead.

The Metaphysical.

I’ve been reading Ann Drake’s book “Healing of the Soul”, which is on shamanism and psychotherapy.  As a shaman studying counselling theory, it seemed a logical read!

As well as having some of the clearest descriptions of shamanic work for a Western audience that I have read, reading the book also challenged me to apply some of the techniques to my own life/spirit.  This is something that, like most humans, I try to avoid because I don’t really enjoy confronting my ‘stuff’.  Helping others is so much easier!

This particular work involves checking one’s chakra systems for blockages then sorting out the blockages.  It was pointed out to me fairly strongly by my spirit colleagues that if I was going to do this for others I needed to do it for myself.  Cowardice was not to be an option, alas!

I was expecting to find a few blockages, especially around my second chakra – given my issues with endo.  What I found was serious blockages round all but three chakras.  My root, third eye and crown chakras were the only unblocked ones.  So, I set to work trying to clear the blockages.  I was expecting to confront stuff from my current life as I know I have had issues in all the affected areas – and this certainly happened.  What I really wasn’t expecting was to be thrown into very strong traumatic memories from previous lives (especially as I’m still not intellectually sure how I feel about the ‘past life’ stuff).  I now know where my deep-to-the-point-of-being-irrational fears of rape and dying through violence come from (I always accepted there were rational fears about these things, but my fears were on a different level again).   Hopefully I can now heal properly.  Certainly it feels like my energy is flowing more freely – and I’m sure the acupuncture will only help this.

So, onwards and upwards now, I hope.  And I trust you now understand why blogging last week was a bit tricky!

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Author: verdant1

belly dancer, mother, student, public servant, shaman, knitter, sister, feminist, gardener and a lot more...

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