Slowing to heal

Thanks to a nasty sinus infection, it’s been a long week already…

Thanks to that sinus infection, I have had to learn to delegate and let go of things at work (in this day and age, a week away from the office is a long time).

Thanks to that sinus infection, I have had to take a good hard look at my activities and priorities and figure out what is genuinely important just now (complicated by the pounding headache affecting my brainwaves).

Thanks to that sinus infection, I’ve spent more time resting and reposing than I am comfortable with.

Thanks to that sinus infection, I am having to admit to my humanity and frailty and learn to ask for help.

Thanks to that sinus infection, I am having to slow myself down so my body can heal.

It’s not being an easy learning nor a comfortable one – and it’s certainly not how I planned to spend my birthday – but it is most definitely a useful learning.

Now to heal (hurrah for antibiotics and decongestants!) and retain the learning as the busyness of life descends again…

One year…

About a year ago, I opened “The Artist’s Way“.

I had no idea what would transpire and transform from this.

I just knew I needed desperately to get out of my own way…

oh yeah....One year on, so much has changed and yet my foundations have remained the same.

I have laughed, I’ve cried, I’ve journalled till my hand aches, I’ve pondered, and I’ve dug deeper and deeper into my soul (and I’m still digging).

I’ve found healing, I’ve found hope, I’ve found joy, I’ve found inspiration. Most of all, I’ve found love – in all its myriad forms.

Now to keep going and see what the next year brings…

 

Lightning Bolts

It’s been one of those weeks where minor incidents and casual comments in passing all add up to shake oneself to the foundations and beyond.

I had thought I was doing all right – getting myself sorted out and heading along the right sort of path.

And I think that is still largely true, but…

…I have also been shaken and stirred and forced to confront issues that were so deeply buried I didn’t even know I was ignoring them!

So this is me right now:

I know it is all for good and will all work out in the end.

I know I will work through things and heal and restore my inner balance and life will be better as a result.

But for the moment, I am going to eat chocolate, drink soothing tea and take time to confront what I’ve avoided for so long.

But for the moment, please be gentle and patient with me 😉

(even if it serves me right for asking those deep questions the other day… be careful what you ask!)

Pondering mind, body and wellness

I’ve been reminded recently about how closely connected our minds and bodies are.

I’m not sure how the traditional dualistic approach of (good) mind vs (bad) body came about, but I’ve seen no evidence for its truth in my own life…

Instead it becomes increasingly clear every bug, every Spring (hello, hay fever 😦 ), and every morning I don’t ‘feel’ like moving, that my mind is most definitely connected to my body, and that my body’s state affects my mind.

When I don’t ‘feel’ well, I don’t think well or ‘do’ well (and sometimes I don’t ‘do’ at all!)

But then when I do feel well, I can do almost anything 🙂

So, how to promote one’s wellness?

There’s all the usual suspects: leafy greens, exercise, sleep (all those things annoying bright-eyed people tell you to do)…

But if I’m starting from a point of being not well, these are harder to do, which can then become a downward spiral (and why is it so hard to generate an upwards spiral?!)

Time, then, for the ‘unusual’ suspects:

#1 Be kind to yourself

It’s okay to not be bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. It’s okay to spend the day in bed if that’s what your mind or body crave. It’s okay to phone in sick when you’re sick.

#2 Be gentle with yourself

You are precious – but may also be fragile. That’s okay. You can nurture yourself and coax yourself gently. You don’t have to do bootcamp everyday, unless that’s what you want. There’s no rule that says you have to ‘go hard’ all the time (or, in fact, any time!)

#3 Listen to your body, as well as your mind

Despite their close connections, our minds sometimes get rather grandiose plans about what our bodies can do. If your body says ‘rest’, then rest. You can play hard later… (see #1 and #2) Of course, if your body says ‘play’, then you can rest later 😉

And if you want to eat more leafy greens, do more yoga, eat paleo, inhale multi-vitamins, or whatever – go for it. But remember the unusual suspects, too ❤

Letting go of the past

I’ve been challenged in recent days about the amount of past baggage I’ve been letting intrude into my present. Between the loving but firm words of good friends and the continuing synchronicity of the internet, I’ve been unable to avoid facing up to this.

When I stopped procrastinating and avoiding it, and actually thought about my baggage, I realised a couple of things:

1. my skin renews itself entirely every seven years – surely I can allow my heart/soul/mind to renew after more than twice that many years, and

2. I’ve had enough of holding onto the past and letting my baggage limit me.

So…

I’ve decided to make the choice to live ‘here and now’ (helped along by this blog post).

I’ve decided to celebrate who I am and all the good I have now.

I don’t need to hold onto past pain and others’ expectations – I can soar higher without that baggage.

I do realise that actually living this way every day will be harder than choosing to make this decision was (and that was hard enough).

That said, I am choosing to work at this, and choosing to let my soul heal.

I am certain it will be worth the effort.

❤ ❤ ❤

Right, that’s the heavy bit over 😉

In the interests of enjoying the here and now, here’s one of my favourite ‘Simon’s cat’ videos:

 

It’s been so long…

… sorry about that…

It’s almost hard working out how to write these posts again…

I’ve been having interesting, internally reflective times in recent months. This makes it hard for me to broadcast much externally – it’s not because I’ve forgotten you 😉

It all started late last year, when I realised my biggest barrier was …me…

So, I started working through Julia Cameron’s The Artist’s Way (which I do recommend – though do adapt it to suit your own life: weekly ‘artist’s dates’ are a distant dream for me, but I do take time to tend my inner artist, and there’s no reason why ‘morning pages’ can’t be done in the evening if that’s what suits you)

Eight months on and still doing my morning pages, I’ve learned a lot about myself and shifted a lot of crap (the psychic skip bin is overflowing!) – and I’m still my biggest barrier! However, I am a lot more conscious, more focused and a lot less effed up, so it’s all good really 🙂

Life is definitely a work-in-progress…

…especially creative life…

 

 

I <3 my journal!

My current journal - the soft leathery binding is so nice!
My current journal – the soft leathery binding is so nice!

I love my journal:

  • I love its soft leathery binding
  • I love its awesome front cover picture
  • I love its quality, thick, creamy paper
  • I love the way my ink pen flows across its pages
  • I love the smell of its binding and paper and the ink – mmmmm!
  • I love how I can write what I’m feeling (no matter what I’m feeling) and it never tells me that I’m stupid or unreasonable or should be feeling something else
  • I love how writing in it helps me release emotions and heal myself
  • I love how I can write pages and pages for a day, then nothing for a week, and it doesn’t matter
  • I love how writing in it clears my mind and soothes my soul as much as any meditation
  • I love how I can read what I wrote some weeks ago and realise how far I’ve come in such a short time, and then I can write some more
  • I love how writing in it draws clarity and sense out of the chaos of life
  • I love how I can realise something and write it down, so I don’t have to realise it all over again
  • I love how writing in it calms me when I’m agitated, inspires me when I’m down, and celebrates when I’m up
  • I love how I can write in beautifully crafted sentences or quick bullet points or barely coherent mind maps, and it’s all good
  • I love how writing in it helps me make sense of life, the universe and everything

I love my journal!